Psychology of Indian Parents
Indian parents seem to have great concerns what other people think and say about them and their family. They get easily influenced by what other’s opinions about their children and believe following the “herd” policy. They worry more about what other people think than what is good and wise as a parent and a human being. Almost 99% of the population of this country preaches herd mentality. It is very difficult to change their mentality as they tend to get stuck on their 19th century rituals and believes all the time.
Indian parents are riding in the same boat again and again.
They want their children to ride in the same boat that they have ridden. According to them, the boys are the actual heirs of the parental property and everything else. And girls are the
“bhoj” as first they have to nurture them and then have to give dowry on their marriages (as per the so called rituals of the Indian society). If it would be a son, then dowry will come from the other side and all they have to do is enjoy his marriage. Therefore, arrange marriages are most preferred in this country, even when it is not from the consent of their boy.
What is the use of this modern lifestyle with that narrow thinking?
We are in the 21st century, living a modern life with amazing technical advancements around us, living a luxurious life, wearing brands, eating in Mc Donald’s & CCD’s and the list goes on, but my question is what is the use of this modern environment when we have a cheap and sophisticated mentality of 19th century’s?
With all this modernization around us, we still have the worst thinking of competition, comparison and everything that motivates the concept of status comparison. All of them are
manifested through child-neglect and societal-preference.
Some of those common beliefs that are making the lives of young girl & boys difficult in India are:
• A girl is going to be married one day, leaving the parental house so there is no way to count her as a supportive agent in parent’s old age.
• Having a young boy or girl in the family, means more chances of disgrace. If a child committed a single mistake or something goes wrong, it will be a huge matter of disgrace for the whole family.
Parents are themselves the victim of this society!
Honestly, we can’t even blame those parents who do not understand the point of view of their children. They are not opened up to the wishes of the child and want to balance the welfare of their child by copying others in the society. Thus Indian parenting is most evolved towards the most unfavorable form of parenting i.e. “herd following.”
The academic front: a factor that Indian parents focus the most!
Indian parents give a lot of importance to the academics of their children. Child’s scores, subjects and performance in school are the most important factor for them. According to them watching TV, playing outside or playing games at schools, co-curricular activities are just a waste of the time. For them “A child can only get success when he/she has a proper degree with high scores marks sheets.” All-in-all the focus is on academics. They emphasize more on a good academic record than the happiness of their children. Often, Indian parents fail to support their children if/she demands to pursue their passion (not related to academics). So, not only does Indian parenting promote herd culture and competition theory, it also makes the young brains give up their dreams. Thus, in the race of making their child
most successful in the society, they fail as parent. This “building of child’s life” has a very weak foundation.